Part 1: From Breaking
the News to Embracing the Terrible 1st Tri
“Your baby is a miracle – there simply is no other word. Millions of babies are born every year, some in riches, some in poverty, some in cities, some in jungles, some unwanted, some devoutly wished for and jubilantly welcomed. The birth of a baby is the most everyday event of all. Yet each birth is an occasion of mystery, marvel, and wonder” - New Baby Book by Edwin Keister, Jr.
I was assigned at the
Nursery for our monthly rotation when I was still doing my volunteer work at
the hospital. Though newborns may look so fragile and irritating at times (they
cry at the most inconvenient hours and may defecate just after you’ve cleaned
them), there was this certain joy that I would feel each time I hold one in my
arms. They’re just so adorable and it was in one of those moments when I was
feeding a baby in my arms that I thought to myself that maybe now’s the time
for me to have my own. I now know how to feed a baby, change their diaper and
how to bathe them. I mean, how much more prepared should I be? The gods must
have laughed at me when I thought of that.
Four months later, we
found out that I was expecting. Upon hearing from my mom that a younger cousin
was pregnant, I did a test myself. My menstrual cycle is irregular meaning my
visitor only visits every other month or every two months. So to have myself
impregnated was like an arrow hitting the target miles away perfectly. So we
were like, “Yehey! We’re going to be parents!” but when the thought began to
sink it, we started to have our doubts. But first, how are we going to tell our
parents?
One thing that I’ve learned about “popping the news” is that you have to let the most important people know it first. And by important, I mean your family. My boyfriend and I told our parents about it first. No matter how nerve wrecking the situation is – especially if you’re an unmarried couple just like us – it will really help if you let them know first. It pays to expect for the worst though and have yourself ready to taste the wrath of hell because admit it, you’ve committed a sin and if you’re unemployed, you’ve just given them the burden of paying for your delivery which is pretty expensive, by the way. In our case though, thankfully – yes, oh god thankfully – we’ve received well and not to mention calm responses from our folks. It’s just very liberating. When you’re done with your parents, try to tell your close friends first before they hear it from others. Not a good way hurting other people’s feelings at a time when you need much of their support.
It would be best to have
your first pre-natal check-up as soon as you know that you’re expecting. Your
OB might have you tested for a serum pregnancy test to make sure or an
ultrasound to check for possible complications like ectopic pregnancy or an
undeveloped embryo. Your pre-natal check-ups will help you in monitoring your
baby’s and your own progress during the entire pregnancy. If you’re having some
financial troubles, a visit to your local health centers will do or check your
local hospitals if they have health packages or charity services that you can
afford. They have free services and child support in some countries abroad so
this part won’t be that much of a problem.
Your first trimester
will be the hardest and I’m not even overstating it. Screw morning sickness. It’s
not like what you see in the movies where the actress pukes and viola she’s
pregnant. Morning sickness can happen at any time of the day. You’ll be
nauseous, severely nauseous. You’ll hate the smell of anything that’s too
strong. Food will taste weird and the toilet will be your new best friend. If
you’re brave enough like me, you’ll try not to vomit because well, you’ve just
had the most glorious meal ever but take note that holding it in won’t help.
You’ll feel queasy and it will only make you more nauseous. I even lost a kilo
on my first trimester because of all my food aversions (I hated chicken, fish,
and anything else that tasted yuck to my palate) and puking. But the key to
avoid starving yourself is to eat small amounts of food in frequent intervals.
Try eating a cracker or a snack in between meals. That way you won’t feel
guilty for starving your youngster.
Aside from the
ungrateful morning sickness – screw you, hormones – you may find that your
used-to-be-flat chest is now sporting a pair of mommy boobies. Your bosoms are
going to be huge and your partner may be enjoying it but it would be best to
put on a “hands off” sign since they’ll be swelling and may hurt a lot. By then
your areola will start to darken and you may feel weird about your physique.
Some moms had glorious
hair when they were expecting. I had my hair bleached to a lighter shade a
month before my pregnancy, so when it started growing out, I had ugly uneven
colored hair. No, you can’t dye your hair as some chemicals used in hair dyes
may be harmful to your baby. There may be some mama-friendly dyes but it would
be better to just wait for your first trimester to finish because it is in this
stage where all major fetal developments are happening or just do all your hair
treatments after your delivery or a few months later on if you plan on
breastfeeding.
Since I’ve already
mentioned that the first trimester is a crucial stage in fetal development,
your doctor will prescribe supplements for you to take. Folic Acid will help in
neural development and you better take your medicines religiously for your
little one’s sake. Again, have your prenatal check-up as soon as possible. It
would also help a lot to eat healthy food (high-protein, starchy food, and
fruits and veg) and do some exercise. They say swimming is the best form of
exercise when expecting. If you used to jog pre-pregnancy, you may be able to
continue on our routine but make sure to check it with your OB first.
You may feel ugly and
terribly irritated at this stage but always remember to try to be optimistic
all the time. Babies need good vibes, after all. Embrace your womanhood and
always feel pretty! If someone compliments you for looking good and fresh, then
that must be the magical pregnancy glow working! Your bump may not start to
show yet but that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t start taking care of
yourself. And oh, before I forget… Congratulations! You’re a mama in the works!
*Morality and religiousness aside, it is a known fact that pregnancy can happen at all ages regardless of social status and financial stability. But take note that I am not promoting pre-marital sex or saying that it should be tolerated. As a medical practitioner, it would be best to follow correct family planning methods (including abstinence) and take part in responsible parenthood. This guide is based on the author’s personal experience and should not be taken as a medical advice.
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